Sophia: I need the money for my old age.
Dorothy: Old age? You don’t leave fingerprints anymore.
[Blanche enters kitchen]
Blanche: I’m nothing but a cheap, tawdry, slut.
[Rose with her back to the kitchen door]
Rose: Let me guess….is it Blanche!
Rose: My mother always used to say, “The older you get, the better you get, unless you’re a banana.”
[Sophia volunteers at a retirement home]
Sophia: Hello, I’m the new Activities Director here.
Woman: What’s your name, honey?
Woman: Sophia, move it, you’re blocking the television!!
Rose: We should put out the welcome mat.
Blanche: But honey, we don’t have a welcome mat!
Rose: What about the one Dorothy says is always at the foot of your bed?
Daily Golden Girls: 06/14/13
Rose: Did you know they have an egg named after you Blanche?
Blanche: Oh really? How is it prepared?
Sophia: Over easy.
Dorothy: Morning ma, did you sleep well?
Sophia: No, I have this recurring nightmare. You know, the one where I am in bed with Warren Beatty and he says, sorry, but this is too sick even for me
Sophia: You’ll be back. You know why? You’re too competitive. It’s always been your worst feature. Actually, your ears are your worst feature. But competitive is right up there.
Dorothy: Do you believe that?
Blanche: No. I always thought your bony feet were your worst feature.
Dorothy: I just got the strangest prank call. Some man wanted to know if I owned a riding crop and a leather bra and if I could lick my eyebrows.
Sophia: What’d ya say?
Dorothy: I told him no.
Sophia: I guess we’re paying full price for the cocktail franks.